Till death do us destroy our bank accounts
It used to be that the focus of a marriage was the act of two individuals standing up in front of family and friends to publicly declare their love for each other.
![](https://images.caxton.co.za/wp-content/uploads/sites/7/2014/01/nickyb1.jpg)
Sadly, somewhere between the proposal, engagement party, kitchen tea, bachelor/ette party, rehearsal dinner, wedding, etc. this seems to have gotten completely lost.
Don’t get me wrong, ever the romantic I’m all for a ‘grand’ gesture when it comes to the proposal, but that doesn’t mean it needs to cost the proposer three months’ salary. Surely something personal that means something to the two people involved is what’s important? Who needs an orchestra, helicopter, doves, balloons, white horse and pygmy hippo at some exotic location? It often seems that the proposal is more about the story the bride-to-be can brag to friends about than something special between two people.
Then there’s the wedding industry itself. Possibly one of the biggest moneymaking schemes out there. Who spends R40 000 on flowers? Or R30 000 on a cake? Since when is R500 a head reasonable? And how in the world do you justify spending R50 000 on a dress you’re going to wear for nine-odd hours? How have things gotten so completely out of hand? Why would you be prepared to start your married life in debt just so that your wedding is more elaborate than your friends? Did I mention that approximately one in eight marriages in South Africa ends in divorce?
The mind boggles!
And, as a guest, when that wedding invite arrives you need to just accept that the world is going to try to suck every last hard-earned cent out of you. This is where most of us reach for the deadly credit card.
Engagement gift for the happy couple – swipe.
Kitchen tea gift for the lovely bride-to-be – swipe.
Plate of eats from Woolworths (because who has time to bake with a full-time job) for the kitchen tea party for the mildly annoying bride – swipe.
Bachelorette party gift for the less-than-virginal bride – swipe.
Your drinks and dinner at bridezilla’s bachelorette party – swipe.
Wedding gift for the they-better-not-get-divorced couple – swipe.
Before you know it, what started out as an exciting event slowly eats away at both your bank balance and sanity.
But wait, it gets worse. The delightful couple has decided on a destination wedding. So now you can start factoring the return plane ticket, accommodation and rental car into the budget too.
So perhaps there’s more to eloping than meets the eye?