Matshepo Malatsi, a Grade 12 learner at Roosevelt High School describes the pressures she and other learners face as they begin preparing for their end of year exams. These results will shape their futures and come after the previous two years were mired by Covid-19 education interruptions. She explains in her own words how she is coping.
Feeling stressed and overwhelmed are emotions that every matric learner feels. It gets worse when hopelessness and loneliness join the equation. On top of it all, there are constant distractions that all learners impose on each other, plus homework and projects and never-ending tests and exams.
Juggling all of this is not easy. I feel the pressure every day and at every moment, to the point where I cry.
As a matric learner life is never easy for the entire year. I would love nothing more than to chill and read a book or watch a movie, but it is just not possible. I am constantly reminded that it is my final year and I need to work hard.
Personally, I don’t believe in working hard, I believe in working smart which means knowing when to take a break or finding things that will help me remember what I’ve learnt more efficiently, but two weeks before prelims and I am going mad.
I am stressed and I do not sleep enough because I am stressed. Studying is not easy because even if we need to, we have homework and projects that take up too much of my time.
On top of all of this, I do athletics which helps me cope with my stress and I use the school which is not always early because we need to work with everyone’s extramural activities. This means I leave home early and get home late. Granted I have good marks, but I want to be the best that I possibly can.
Despite it all, I am trying to stay positive. With all that is happening, it is hard to stay positive and focused. Not all of us come from the same background, but we can create a new future, and with all the constant comparison between learners, it gets hard. But I don’t let that get to me.
Let me not get started with the growing need to get into a good university. It is the worst. I have hope that I will get in, but for what is the question. The stress of that too is getting to me.
Through it all I have an amazing support system. My grade manager, Afrikaans teacher and my ‘former’ (fancy I must say) social sciences teacher are all people who help me through my complex problems, especially with school.
My best friends are there to help me to smile through my problems. Best of all, I have my mom, who helps me and supports me through all my dark days and my best, my Lord, who helps me through it all.
All these people give me hope to keep pushing and to not give up and see myself in a positive manner and to dream bigger than before.
Although I am so stressed and highly overwhelmed, I know that I must not quit because I haven’t reached my best yet.
I wish other kids could have that support system because feeling stressed and feeling like there is not enough time, is every matric learner’s nightmare.
I am lucky because I have options available to me to help me and I am grateful. Even if I’m tired and I would like to sleep, all this will be worth it in the end.
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