‘Society always blames the rape victim’
"Stop teaching woman how not to be raped," says Jes Foord.
THE drugging and raping of a Durban North women has shocked the community. While many residents have come out in support of the 43-year-old woman, some are questioning the reasons for not laying a charge with police. Hayley (who would only give her first name) alleged that her drink was spiked at a Durban North bar with the ‘date rape drug’, Rohypnol.
She was then taken to an uMhlanga flat by an unknown man where she was raped. She awoke the next morning, naked and covered in bruises, with no memory of the events leading up to where she was. To her utter disbelief, Hayley found the man smirking at her when she woke up. The incident took place almost two weeks ago ago.
According to Jes Foord, of the Jes Foord Foundation (JFF), there is often a tendency to blame victims of rape rather than the actions of the rapist. Foord was attacked and raped in 2008 by three men.
“People always look for reasons as to why a women was raped or what could be done to avoid being raped. We need to stop teaching women how not be raped and we should instead be looking at the actions of men who rape. Society always blames the rape victim. Often after being raped, victims feel guilt and shame, which are part and parcel of the process. I would advise anyone who has been raped to open a case with the police and to seek out counselling.
“Women who are rape victims should feel understood and supported. While some women feel there are too ashamed to open a case and won’t do it for themselves, they should do it for other women out there. It may be your best friend, sister or mother,” Foord said.
