2020 will be remembered as the year of the poo, and not for the reasons you are thinking about.
More specifically, 2020 is the year my second-born mastered potty training.
I say mastered because there are still 3 months remaining and I cannot bear to think I might still be cleaning soiled underpants in 2021.
It all comes from being an over-confident, over-eager parent with your second child.
You don’t realise that first children are designed to lure you into a false sense of security.
You brag to your friends about just how easy potty training and discipline were, and your model first child is on display for all to admire.
‘Why do other parents not remain kind but firm when disciplining their children?’, you muse, and ‘If they did not suffer nonsense it would save them a world of trouble’.
Once you have climbed sufficient lofty heights of your own cleverness the second child arrives and its a very far fall back down.
With a nasty jolt comes the realisation that you know nothing about parenting, at least not how to parent ‘this’ child.
My mistake with potty training, of course, was starting too soon.
It backfired big time.
For the love of all things clean, do not rush into this.
You are not in a race.
Whatever you do, do not believe those blogs titled ‘Potty train your child in 3 days’.
I’ve done it all.
It’s all hogwash (of course if I’d waited until he was almost 3 it might have…).
My second-born is also gifted with an iron will (I am sure this is going to benefit him hugely later in life but right now I am fighting the urge to throw him bodily from the window).
The ‘trick’ with Ruben is you have to make him believe it was his idea or you are in for a battle you will not win.
Brushing teeth is a good example.
No two-year-old likes having his teeth brushed.
But I am told most put up with it as a necessary evil.
Oh no, not Ruben.
It can take up to 20 minutes to brush the little tyke’s pearly whites and usually one of us cries (more often it’s me).
I beg, plead, bribe and threaten, and this child calls my bluff.
It’s truly astonishing.
The experience can only be described as somewhere between bathing a cat and the movement of an iceberg.
***
A reader wrote asking if we have “any kind of vetting process before publishing an opinion piece?” regarding former editor Bruce Stephenson’s Two Bits column last week.
You can read the full letter on page 8.
And I would reply, most certainly we do.
We are guided by the Press Code, it’s worth a read (presscouncil.org.za).
The preamble to the code states:
“The media exist to serve society. Their freedom provides for independent scrutiny of the forces that shape society, and is essential to realising the promise of democracy. It enables citizens to make informed judgments on the issues of the day, a role whose centrality is recognised in the South African Constitution.”
We take this role very seriously and a key part of enabling this scrutiny is creating space for diverging voices and opinions to be heard.
We do this every day across the newspaper in news articles, the letters page and our opinion pieces.
Unless your opinion crosses the line*, we won’t censor you just because we disagree with you.
Yes, you have the right to be offended.
But perhaps if we used less energy in taking offence, and more on seeking to understand one another, our society would be united and less easily divided by the politics of petty theatrics.
The inability to hear another’s opinion is perhaps the single biggest issue for society right now.
Social media is full of offence.
The premise being that if you disagree with me then I can attack you as a person.
To disqualify someone’s opinion based solely on their race and gender is at best misguided and at worst, racist and sexist.
*While politicians use platforms like Twitter to incite violence and hatred with very few, if any, consequences, the media watches closely to prevent ourselves being used in this way. The three deadly sins of the Press Code, where freedom of expression falls away, are: 1) Propaganda for war; 2) Incitement of imminent violence; and 3) Advocacy of hatred that is based on race, ethnicity, gender or religion, and that constitutes incitement to cause harm.
Most of Malema’s tweets would fall into this category.