State Capture Inquiry: An ideal script for ET movie

If ever Steven Spielberg, American film director, runs out of ideas for plots, he should simply pitch with camera crew and record the daily spectacle of the Commission of Inquiry into State Capture.

Lies, distortions, political gobbledegook are all there for the taking. For Spielberg, it means two genres horror and comedy.

Or another extraterrestrial movie, with ET in Jacob Zuma’s role.

ET, Go Home? Capturing the current questioning of President Cyril Ramaphosa would’ve been a good start.

He was, after all, a witness to the Zuma shenanigans from the start and should add meat to the story, seeing the chief actor has never appeared himself to tell it like it is.

So, lights, camera, action. Judge Raymond Zondo gets the day’s proceedings going and introduces the witness and the interrogating advocate.

ALSO READ: Five reasons Ramaphosa stayed in Zuma’s Cabinet amid state capture claims

The questioning begins:

Advocate Paul Pretorius: “Mr President, while still deputy president, were you aware of the goings on of the president and his link to the arms deal and later the notorious Gupta family?”

President: “Mr Chairman, yes and no. It’s rather a complex matter.”

Pretorius: “Mr President, in your affidavit found in batch file marked A, page 56, number 6 and small letter i, you say you only got to know about the arms deal and who were implicated through the media. Is that right?”

President: “Yes and no. I refused to believe the articles. Then when Schabir Shaik was imprisoned for his relationship with the former president, I knew for sure”.

Pretorius: “But did you not think it strange that only the one party was incarcerated?”

President: “Not really. I saw it as politically expedient. All’s fair in love and war. Ha! Ha! You know what I mean”.

The judge forces a smile. Pretorius frowns deeply.

The poor judge now starts earning his keep by trying to evaluate these discombobulated assertions and come up with a credible report.

I reckon by that time, Zuma would’ve been paroled. And probably a new president, and true to ANC norm, the report collects dust for “political expediency”.

However, with luck, Zondo the Movie.