Picture for illustration: iStock
Many black women in this country have had to fight for their place in the world.
They’ve had to fight in personal and professional spaces, but what I see is that even when they reach the top, they don’t stop fighting with those around them and, especially, with those beneath them.
I think it’s a trauma response to be in that defence mode for so long that even when it’s time to stop fighting, it becomes a little difficult because the way to the top was only through a fight.
I did an interview recently at a women’s empowerment event and one of the speakers spoke about letting go of hyper-independence. That, for me, means knowing when to ask for help, recognising when you do need help and knowing that accessing help doesn’t take your spot at the top.
It’s this hyper-independence that also contributes to women fighting with those around and beneath them – especially in a working environment.
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My own experience of female black leaders hasn’t been particularly great.
It’s almost as if I worked with women who were afraid of being replaced, so they ruled with an iron fist and any wrongdoing was met with the ultimate wrath.
I always aspired to be like the black women who are leaders in the media industry because it’s admirable; representation matters.
It matters to a young black girl from the township who aspires to a career in writing (which is already frowned upon) and to see another black woman taking her stories to the world and implementing change in society from just telling stories.
It makes one believe you are capable of doing something worthy.
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But now imagine working with someone who represents you and many young dreamers, only to find that it’s not all glitter and gold.
It’s such a shame that we still celebrate women in male-dominated industries – not because they aren’t worthy of celebrating but because women are still fighting to not be seen as the inferior gender.
It’s worse for black females because, realistically, they also are socially ranked lower than white females.
In South Africa, the department of employment and labour reported that just last year, only 26.5% of women held management positions and only 8% are chief executive officers.
That’s not because women did not attend the same schools, trainings or have the same work experience as men – and in some cases even supersede some men – but because socialisation decided women are inferior.
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Now those who have made it to the top fight with those who have the potential to get to the top, because it no longer is about how many women can be brought to the top, it’s more about how that one woman wants to stay at the top.
In another story I did, a young successful black man owning an entrepreneurial hub admitted that, to date, females are also fighting off sexual harassment in the business field.
He admitted that many of the entrepreneurs he has guided have listed sexual favours as their biggest hurdle to the other side.
Now, imagine a black female CEO who has experienced racism, sexism, ageism and all the other injustices of this world. How tired they must feel when they finally occupy that seat.
Even with that being said, I think it’s no excuse to mistreat others.
If anything, it would be inspirational if those women can keep fighting, but for the right reason: fight for more women to join them at the top.
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