Columns 20.3.2015 06:00 am

Everybody just needs a chill pill

An ill-mannered conversation I had this week with a spokesperson revealed just how thin the line has been drawn between how human beings speak to each other.

There is no need to be rude or obnoxious – but in today’s society it is a sharp reality. Today I will write this column quite simply.

There is really no need to shout above your lungs, be accusatory. I thought he maybe had a bad day and I was his outlet but is that an excuse? This spokesperson, however, was not the only one I have dealt with who spoke in that manner. There have been many.

When you are rude and obnoxious to another person for no reason but your own, you are being demeaning. It is never a nice thing to do. The phone call had killed what started out as a good evening when I heard the words: “Let me start by telling you”. And eventually ended without a goodbye.

After being in such a conversation, one sits in stunned silence for a moment. Your brain tries to comprehend what just happened and why. But what I always wonder is how does the other person feel on the other end of the line. Is the one who did the shouting sitting back thinking to himself: “I told her.” Is he just as angry, or is he calmer – given the fact the amount of steam that had been let off? Or, do they sit there in their own silence – also reflecting about their own utterances – in short, do they feel bad?

It’s never easy juggling the things we have to deal with in today’s society and we often use other people as an outlet when we have that bad day. You see, what happens when you project anger upon another is that you take a little bit of happiness out of them, each time.

So, here’s a little lesson on how to deal with those who are rude and discourteous, and maybe those who are that way can learn something too. The key to living happier is to not make frustration a habit. If being a frustrated and angry person is “just who you are” then no one can save you. You will have to draw yourself out of being this way with your own self-effort. And if you are subjected to bad manners – “kill them with kindness”, as they say. Because being kind to another is far greater a trait than being unpleasant.

 

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