Activists demonstrate, 25 February 2022, outside the South Gauteng High Court during the trial of Samuel Kgoadi, who allegedly bludgeoned his wife Koena Kgoadi to death with a hammer in Tembisa last year. Picture: Michel Bega
Another woman has died and her death has led to a series of protests, another year when men sing and dance about equal rights for women and the protection of women.
Being a woman in South Africa is just such a struggle. Today we chant justice for Namhla Mtwa, tomorrow it will be a new name.
Let us explore the abuse of women in South Africa, in all its ugly faces. Our men are angry.
Angry that women are educated, liberated, stepping out of their shadow and women are starting to take charge of their identity.
Men see this as a threat, they were never ready for women giving them the ultimatum that if they do not shape up, they must ship out…
If you cannot man up, please hold my stilettos while I do your job and mine – with precision.
Let me say that there is no weight for a woman to carry than that of a weak man, someone who wants to be seen as the head of the house but is still stuck at the school playground.
For some reason or the other, society seems to be producing this kind in excessive masses – we have more of them than we can handle.
The reason for this is because society is quick to make excuses for the weaknesses of men. So much so that men are looking for society to make more excuses and forgive.
ALSO READ: The issue of GBV is destroying lives
Can we also just be honest, some men are intimidated by strong women because they just do not want to be interrupted in their mediocrity.
Never wanting to be questioned on why they are not progressing in life. The fact that this heinous crime happened in a rural setting speaks of cultural expectations.
Let’s call the woman who defies stereotypes the cosmopolitan woman, just for this piece.
This is the woman who is seen as a cultural misfit because she is not willing to set herself on fire in a bid to keep someone else warm – my kind of woman.
Tell me this though, why should this woman not defy cultural expectations if she is to care for herself and also, in turn, provide for him?
Moving into the social context, why should a woman not stand up for herself when she feels that a man is trying to belittle her …
Those are the type of men who sow disrespect and expect respect in return.
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