MBOMBELA- When people initially discover they have cancer, they may feel overwhelmed, vulnerable and alone.
People Living with Cancer (PLWC) believe that one should not be alone in their Cancer journey. It is a time where support can make all the difference, specifically support from someone who has had first-hand experience of suffering through cancer with an intimate knowledge of the processes involved.
For Heloise de Villiers of Nelspruit cancer ran in her family. The word “cancer” conjured up feelings of fear, dread and anxiety – not always for her but mainly for her loved ones. “How are they going to take the news? How will I make them realise that just knowing they are there with a helping hand and a hug is more than enough? All these questions hovered in my mind but it had to happen I had to tell them,” says de Villiers.
Heloise lost her mother and her aunt to cancer. At 55, the same age as her mother was when she was diagnosed, Heloise was also diagnosed with breast cancer. Telling her family about the cancer was the most difficult thing she had to do. “I was more concerned about how my family would take the news more than myself. When I heard I had cancer, I accepted it and I did not go through the stages of denial, anger and acceptance.
“The thought of losing my hair bothered me more than reason why that was going to happen,” says Heloise. “My family and friends could not understand this and said “but Heloise, you are going to lose your breasts and you did not cry, but the loss of your hair is worse?” I remember saying to them that if I have no hair people will know I have cancer and they will feel sorry for me! I did not want pity from the outside world!”
“Your cancer will affect everyone involved in your life and everyone who cares about you,” says Heloise. “Remember that it is hard for them too, but also remember that it is cancer that is causing the problems, not you. With one phone call, an invitation to lunch, a glass of wine, sitting, chatting and laughing, the world once again became a sparkling place to be. The philosophy of ubuntu (togetherness) is more prevalent in the journey of cancer than anywhere else. The struggle against cancer is difficult and it can be a long lonely road, but with the incredible support and love I got from family, friends and colleagues everything was possible and there was no way I could ever have given up.”
Support is a pillar of PLWC, which is why Cancer Buddies, a free support network, was established in 2002. Linda Greef, co-Founder of Cancer Buddies says, “Cancer Buddies allows cancer patients to interact with and receive practical advice and support from cancer survivors who have a similar profile and disease and who have regained their lives. Heloise de Villiers of Nelspruit is one of the individuals willing to offer support.”
Tyron Hansen, who is Product Manager for Dulcolax, which sponsors Cancer Buddies, says the support system is a critical network for people living with cancer. “Their work touches the lives of so many which is why Dulcolax is so passionate about supporting the initiative.”
Should you, a friend or a family member be diagnosed with cancer and would like more information on People Living with Cancer and Cancer Buddies please contact 0800 033 337, visit our website www.cancerbuddies.org.za or www.plwc.org.za or e-mail us at info@plwc.org.za.
