A person’s first year of tertiary studies is an exciting and challenging adventure, a learning curve, and may also be seen as an essential part of life.
According to the IIE’s Varsity College Waterfall public relations and events coordinator Nicolien Kriek, the first few weeks on campus are crucial for all new students. “During this time, they [students] will need to make decisions that could have an impact on the rest of their lives. Although the shift from secondary to tertiary is exciting, first years will need to learn to adapt to a new environment where they will need to make new friends, become independent, and meet academic expectations,” Kriek explained.
The Waterfall campus community shared some tips to guide first-year students to adapt and, hopefully, thrive.
The head of student experience at the campus Tim Verne emphasised the importance of attending orientation. “[Orientation] is jam-packed with exciting activities, from academic orientation to the student experience showcase where student committees share what they offer and how you can get involved. This is a crucial week which could ensure that you form friendships and strong bonds with your peers, learn to navigate your way around campus, and receive all your academic information,” said Verne.
The campus head Avadhi Ghela said, “You need to ensure that you do the things you don’t want to do because nobody else is going to do it for you.”
Ghela said the first-years should learn to take control, own their year, remain accountable, remain responsible, and always put their best foot forward even on the hard days, and if they found themselves struggling, they should ask for help.
For many first-year students, the move from secondary to tertiary studies was massive as they needed to dig deep, and show grit and self-belief, added Ghela.
Ruan Brashaw, the head of student recruitment advised that first-years should find a system that worked for them. “Taking notes with a laptop might be faster and easier than writing notes by hand. On the other hand, taking notes with a good old pen might help you remember the content of your lecture better than if you had typed them. Taking notes will force you to pay attention and help you to focus, especially on those difficult days,” explained Brashaw.
The head of IT support Stanley-Kgothatso Legoabe said students should remain true to themselves and remember their purpose.
Legoabe advised students not to apply the ‘better late than never’ mindset to assignment submissions and exam preparations as submitting assignments on time and drawing up a schedule prioritised study time.
Head of finance Palesa Loselo said, “The transition from secondary to tertiary education can be truly remarkable. During this time you may be shaped into the man or woman you would like to become. It is important to work smart and always to have a game plan.”
Third-year Bachelor of Commerce Strategic Management and chairperson of the social committee Shaakirah Saliem concluded that first-year students should do their best to make friends outside class.
“Participate in the campus events, make as many connections as you can, and make your first year memorable by involving yourself in social experiences you never thought you would. Your first year of tertiary is where you could learn more about yourself and make friends for life.”
Lead 2: Bringing teen suicide into the light
According to Mark de la Rey, a clinical psychologist at Netcare Hospital, along with freedom and independence, students at the tertiary level could face greater stress from a variety of sources such as increased academic demands, adjusting to a new environment, and developing a new support system.
Tertiary studies also provided an opportunity for youth to experiment with alcohol and other drugs, which may compound problems with mood and increase the risk of suicide.
De la Rey said in a world of extreme academic pressure, online bullying, and other social challenges, teenagers would be far better equipped at navigating this difficult subject if they have the opportunity to talk it through at home before they reach a higher institution level.
“The thought of one’s child taking his or her own life is so horrifying to any parent that many of us push it to the back of our minds rather than confronting the possibility. However, during the tricky teen years, it is crucial to talk openly about suicide and shine the light on a potentially life-saving conversation,” he said.
De la Rey said parents may be apprehensive about how best to approach this topic but naturally, this needed to be done at an age-appropriate level remembering that children have access to and were exposed to information and misinformation about difficult subjects such as suicide. “We cannot shelter them from that and treating it as taboo would be dangerous.
“What you can do as a parent is to help unpack why some people take their own lives and how such a tragedy is not the only option. A good ice breaker might be to suggest watching a Ted Talk about suicide together and then allowing everyone to discuss their views about it afterward. You may get an eye roll or two but that is a small price to pay for keeping the lines of communication open.”
De la Rey pointed out that suicidal ideation sprouted from some level of depression or a mood disorder, and that suicide – whether attempted or successful – indicated a genuine sense of hopelessness.
“Unfortunately, there are not always clear signs, especially in teens who are high functioning and good at sports, performing well academically, popular in their friend group, and so on. This makes it easier for them to mask their true mental state, which they may do to live up to that which they believe is expected of them.”
He said when children were very young, parents were 100% responsible for them. When they became teens, it was a transitionary phase where it was natural for them to become more independent and parents needed to shift into a more supportive role as teens started learning how to be accountable for their actions.
De la Rey said it was not easy to know when to let go as a parent, and if you saw problematic behaviour it was even harder.
“No matter what phase you are in with your teen, let your presence in their life be known. If they push you away, don’t be put off. They need to know that you are around and that you are there for them.
“Your child needs to know they can come to you with a problem, no matter how terrible it may appear to them at the time. This means being measured in your responses, which is not always easy when dealing with the emotionally charged and sometimes chaotic world of teenagers.”
He concluded that if one knew or suspected that their child or friend was having suicidal thoughts, then they should seek professional help.
Mark de la Rey offers these tips on how to notice people who are depressed or having suicidal thoughts:
- Stressful situations
There are certain instances in which teenagers can become so caught up that they are not able to take a step back and regain perspective without some help. This includes common scenarios, some of which are near impossible to avoid, such as exam pressures and relationship issues. Others may be less apparent such as online bullying or blackmail over compromising photographs they may have shared. The digital environment can be extremely threatening to your child’s mental health and this is an area that needs a lot of discussion. - Significant changes
Any significant behaviour change can be a warning sign. Life as a parent is understandably very busy and it can be easy to miss a signal, so it is important to have a sense of what is happening in your teen’s daily life. If you have a child who is usually very active and social but becomes withdrawn or a child who has always been a homebody but now seems to be looking for reasons to stay away, keep a watchful eye. Sudden outbursts of anger and frustration and changes in daily habits can also point to emotional difficulty.
- Speaking with finality
Sometimes people having suicidal thoughts will do and say things that can indicate plans to end their life. This may come out in careless language, for example, saying ‘you won’t have to deal with me much longer’ or perhaps ‘maybe we’ll meet again one day’ to a close friend. Such statements are sometimes made on social media, which is a cry for help that must be taken seriously.
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