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Every time I hear it, my heart cries for the person. I decided to write this short article for all of you that feel as if you have lost yourself, or if you have a loved one experiencing it right now.
2020 Obviously, has not been kind to many people and has put many people into a state of feeling hopeless or without direction. It is very normal to feel lost.
Every 7 years of our lives we undergo a “season “of change. Think back over your life. Birth to 7 years old, first season. Then from 7 to 14 it all changed. From 14 to 21 years old, your entire world turned upside down (again) and everything changed. 21 to 28 Was a very defining time. 28 to 35 was “lets build a life”. 35 to 42 to 49 to 56 and on it goes.
Every seventh year a change happens. The younger we are, the easier we often adapt according to the changes. From 25 onwards it starts to become more of a challenge. Very often we do not want to embrace the change and all we want to do is stay the way we were.
Imagine a caterpillar going into a cocoon and emerging as a butterfly. It will experience confusion during the process. I believe it will emerge as a butterfly and have a sense of feeling lost. It has lost its 38 legs; it cannot eat leaves anymore and its family of caterpillars just do not understand it any longer. Only when it embraces the change and accepts that it is not what it used to be; can the caterpillar BE the butterfly. Now it can fly.
You are not lost, you are new.
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I often have clients that come for coaching. The typical statements are “I don’t know what happened, I was at the top of my career and then it felt like the bottom just fell out. I do the same things, but don’t seem to get any results anymore”.
That statement is like the butterfly complaining it cannot eat leaves anymore.
You have changed.
To find yourself, you often, need to let go. Let go of the past and embrace your future. The “new season” of your life has brought with it, new gifts, talents, awareness, capabilities, and wisdom.
Tip
Take some time to write a letter to yourself, where you tell yourself who the new you are. Write down whatever comes to mind. Keep writing until you feel the truth of the real you deep inside yourself. You might feel very emotional when this happens. That is a good emotion, embrace it. No one in this world can define you or truly knows you as you do. No one can tell you who you are. You know. The answers are in you. Explore the new you.
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Change is the only constant in life.
Do you still wear the clothes style you did 20 years ago? Do you talk the same way you did when you were 7, or did you adapt? Of course, you adapted. The sense of feeling lost is a sign that you are changing and that you do not understand the change. Sometimes we have resistance to change.
Embracing change is empowering.
Realising that you are “a work in progress” is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Accepting change has the power to free you from desperately holding on to the past. The past is done, it is behind you. We learn from the past to empower our present, to create our future. If your inner voice burns to help people with struggles like this or similar struggles, come join me for a free day of training where I will teach ( for free) how the mind and emotions impact our daily lives.
You can find dates and times at www.actionfactory.co.za