Swearing in front of kids: The good, the bad, and the ugly
The question of whether swearing in front of children is harmful to their development and wellbeing is one that many parents struggle with.
If you’re a sweary parent who frequently mutters salty four-letter words, this article is for you! We explore whether swearing in front of children is really as bad as we’ve been told.
The evolution of profanity
It seems that over the years, society’s views on swearing in front of kids have changed. As late as the 1980s and 1990s most people felt that swearing in front of kids was taboo. Many parenting experts would teach that doing so should give kids the message that foul language was both acceptable and a passive encouragement to use it themselves. Today, however, you frequently hear parents using these colourful expletives regardless of who might be around and listening. Parenting experts are starting to shift their views as well.
A modern-day and age
The fact of the matter is that even if you are very careful about what you say, your kids are going to be exposed to this type of language no matter what you do. There are very few television shows, movies, and even novels that kids enjoy that don’t use some type of curse words. Even some nightly news programmes have peppered some of their reports with the occasional bad word. In fact what actually constitutes a swear word is changing and in some places, words that were once viewed as foul language are perfectly acceptable. A few examples of these words include:
- Bollocks
- Bugger
- Crikey
- Rubbish
- Twat
- Get Stuffed
What research suggests
One recent study at Keele University in the United Kingdom showed that swearing at times of extreme stress or pain may actually enable the person to endure the agony for a little longer. Dr. Richard Stephens had groups stick their hands in freezing water. Those people who were allowed to swear during this test were able to withstand the pain for up to 40 seconds longer than the group not allowed to use colourful expletives.
A language shift
A number of parenting experts are now saying that the focus needs to shift from completely avoiding bad language to learning when it’s more appropriate. For example, most schools still do not allow any swear words so using this type of language in school would not be a good idea. Although even this is changing as recent studies have indicated that many students use “hell” and “damn” without a second thought and were surprised to learn that these are considered swear words.
Swop this for that
While teaching the kids that using bad language is unacceptable, experts also suggest helping to supply kids with a realm of alternatives. For example, using “holy snot” can be just as effective as its less socially acceptable relative “holy sh–t”. Furthermore, by teaching kids to come up with alternatives, you’re helping to stretch their vocabularies and creativity. For most people, there are acceptable times and places for foul language (smashing a finger with a hammer seldom results in an outburst of “shoot”). And these days these words are all around us. As parents, however, it’s up to you to teach your kids when and where these words could be used.
