“People do not understand what a marriage is all about. That is why we have many divorces these days. They need to know and understand the demands of a marriage before marrying. People should not forget their cultural ways when entering in a marriage. It is always crucial to respect and listen to each other in a relationship. Being selfish does not work in any marriage,” he said.
Mvuyo Baba said marriage is a blessing and can never be a problem. “It is important for couples to marry and build better homes for their children. In a marriage, a couple should not go to bed angry at each other even if one is not happy with the conditions. Do not expect your partner to change after marrying. It is also important to marry someone you know you love and understand very much. Some people marry to impress their friends,” he said.
Sandile Mdluli believes a normal and healthy marriage does not go to 50/50. “People should learn to love their partners unconditionally and respect them. Do not marry to enrich yourself from someone’s wealth and property. I think most marriages are falling apart because some people are materialistic and do not love a person as a person. We need to be certain about the things we think we can live with. A marriage is a good thingand I believe it is almost everyone’s dream,” he said.
“There is nothing wrong with a marriage. We, the people, are failing to understand each other in our marriages. We always allow the third person or friends or family members to take charge in our marriages and this ruins everything. When marrying, people need to understand the new path they will be taking. Seek out all the best advice that can help when encountering problems. Not only from your families, but from pastors, counsellors or social workers. In a marriage, we sit down and talk about everything, we need to remain loyal and transparent,” said Sisa Nyume.
Maphefo Kolobe said marriage is planned by God and is not a problem. “Some couples are unable to control their emotions when they have problems. They are falling to communicate and would go out discouraging people from marring, saying marriage is a problem. Every marriage encounters problems but people should know how to avoid them. Knowing what some of the major stumbling blocks are can better help you eliminate potential marital problems,” she said.
“People make their relationship difficult after marrying. They change the methods of how they used to treat their partners and become rude when speaking to them. Where there is faulty communication, there will be problems. Poor communication leads to divorce, because everyone wants to be respected. People should learn to avoid competition in their marriage. Strive for a win-win situation when trying to come to an agreement on something,” said Wandy Makakula.
