This has been a difficult time and experience for all facing the pandemic. I never thought I would lose my mother to this silent killer called coronavirus. Five days before my birthday, my innocent mother lost her life due to Covid-19.
Shocking news
My family sat in the waiting room at a hospital waiting for news on my mom’s sudden illness status. Doctors told us she had several heart attacks and that her organs are failing. This was due to her age and viral infections in her system. We were all shocked to find out that my mom was so sick yet she never showed much pain or weakness. We experienced a long wait in the cold hospital for a bed for my mom. The cold and hunger passed by as we felt helpless waiting for medical attention for my sick and disorientated mom. She sat on a chair with drips and oxygen mask confined to a room with possible Covid-19 patients who were also coughing and struggling to breathe. We waited 12 hours before a bed was cleared so that my mom can finally take rest. The cold outside in the dark is nothing like the cold and discomfort patients in the ward experienced while waiting for treatment or care. Finally, we left our tired mother to be escorted to her bed, not knowing that that was the last time we will ever see my dear mother. She was so brave and fearless, She just gave us a long look of ‘goodbye’ telling us not to cry and to be strong. We left hoping we will see her the next day. To our surprise, we could not care for her or see her the following morning. My mother was taken to a room of patients that were waiting for their Covid-19 test results. We were furious and worried, confused about why the hospital put high-risk patients in one ward. Daily we would have to phone the hospital to find out the progress of my mother, just to find out that her condition has worsened. Nurses left us with no hope. My family was stressed and worried, feeling helpless. The fact that no one could talk or be with my mom during her last days hurt us all so deeply as children and grandchildren. Finally, we asked the hospital if we can allow a Priest to pray for my mom in her last hours. That too was not allowed due to the rules. We left our strong mother to strangers and in fear of dying alone with no one to comfort or pray for her departure.
Stress and sorrow
Everyone who was in contact with my mom had to go for Covid-19 tests and quarantined ourselves so that our family could be safeguarded. We finally got our results and some members in our family, including myself, tested positive. We laid in our confined rooms, stressing about our mother and the safety of our family at home. The illness stole away the time and thoughts of our mother who was suffering to survive. Sorrow and pain were in everyone’s heart, stressing about the family members who were positive, and my mother who was in the hospital fighting for another chance of life. The weakness caused by the virus left me thinking that I will die alone in my room, enduring pain and discomfit without anyone knowing. Our husbands and children assisted us by providing food and medication. They also faced sorrow worrying about everyone’s health.
Sad news
My mom finally passed away; everyone found it difficult to accept. As siblings, we could not console each other. We had to call each other, expressing our pain and sorrow using inactive methods of communication. The worst part of all was arranging a funeral that we couldn’t attend. Only six people from our family were part of the funeral procedures. We could not say goodbye or see our mother’s face for the last time. No closure to her final chapter. Days passed by and I dreamed about my mother. I looked for her in my dreams but she was not there! I felt her presence but can’t hear or see her. We try to accept and find peace but it is not easy. Everything we do remind us of our mother. We are left with so many unresolved questions. This was not how it was supposed to end! My mom deserved a better farewell.
Appreciate your family
I would like to acknowledge all the strong and brave women this month. I salute all the mothers that are here today and those that left us to be in a better place because life without a mother is a missing opportunity to happiness, love, and support. I can relate to everyone that has lost a loved one during this pandemic. Words cannot explain the emotional and financial stress everyone is facing but we have to be strong for our family as mothers. How do we go on without having the chance to say goodbye to our loves ones. My mother would always say that losing a mother is the worst emotional loss one could face and that’s true. I miss her and feel her absence daily. Appreciate and love your family, no one knows which day you well be taken away from this world. Take every day as the last day by being happy, helpful and make a difference to everyone’s life. Miss you mama! Alberton resident
