ETHELBERT Child and Youth Care Centre, a local non-profit organisation, firmly believes that communication is key for relationships to flourish and, with 65 children in its care, shares top tips on how to effectively communicate with a child.
The organisation’s social worker, Marcell Erêche said there are nine easy, tried and tested ways to successfully engage positively with a child.
“Children often feel as though the adults in their lives aren’t really listening to them. When children don’t feel heard, they resort to other methods to gain attention, such as opposition, defiance or exhibit poor behaviour. This leads to stress for the parent and child, as well as a potentially strained relationship. The good news is these poor behaviours can be easily changed by the way parents interact with their children – and it starts with effective communication,” said Erêche.
Put the phone down
The social worker urged parents to set aside their cell phones, make eye contact with the child and talk with no interruption.
“Our phones seem to be a permanent fixture to our hands and, since we love multitasking so much, we figure we can have a conversation and answer emails at the same time. Spoiler alert, we can’t,” said Erêche.
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Stop what you are doing
If parents are busy when a child would like to talk to them, Erêche urged parents to complete their task and then start the conversation.
Limit their distractions
“If they are in the middle of watching TV or playing video games, limit distractions by turning those devices off so you can have a conversation,” she said.
Move closer
The social worker highlighted the importance of proximity when having a conversation with a child. “When you make the effort to be closer to your child, they feel as though you truly care about what they have to say,” she said.
Repetition
To show a child they are not only being heard, but listened to, parents are urged to repeat back what has been said.
Let your child talk
Erêche urged parents not to cut off or interrupt a child while they are speaking. “You may have something to add or may be excited to share your input, but interrupting them can make them feel as though what they have to say isn’t important,” she said.
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Encouragement
According to Erêche, encouragement to expand on one or two word answers will help grow their communication skill. She also urged parents to rephrase the way questions are asked in an effort to encourage more dialogue.
Be excited
“We have all been in situations where we are talking to someone and the person seems truly uninterested in what we have to say. This can be so damaging to a child’s self-esteem if they feel what they have to say isn’t important or cared about. When your child talks to you, be excited. Smile, clap, give them positive feedback,” said Erêche.
Tell them you love them
While there are numerous ways in which a parent can show their affection for their child, Erêche has found the best way to show a child they are cared for is to tell them directly.
Caxton Local Media Covid-19 reporting
