Hillcrest childhood couple celebrate 50 years of marriage

HONESTY and trust is what binds childhood lovers, Nontando and Richard Duma who celebrated their 50th anniversary on Friday.

The Hillcrest couple loved each other secretly from a distance until Richard gained the courage to walk Nontando to the shops.

“I use to admire her from a distance and after the first walk, it became a normal for me to accompany her.

Nontando said the funny thing is that she also had feelings for him before he introduced himself to her.

“I did not even know his name. I think I might have been 12 at that time and I would tell my cousin about my crush whenever he went past my house with his friends.

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She said at that age she did not know anything about love and her cousin threatened to tell her parents.

“I think what attracted me to him at that time was not love as I was still very young, but the fact that he resembled my brothers,” she said.

After going out for six years, Richard and Nontando were married at St James Church in Lamontville on 30 March 1968.

Richard said Nontando’s honesty and trustworthiness made him decide to take her as his wife.

“Every time I confided in her, it was kept between the two of us and I could trust her with anything, she honours her words,” he said.

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For Nontando, Richard’s love and care swept her away.

“He was so honest, even though we were sometimes apart for a long time because I was still in high school when he was at university and that did not stop our love.

“I knew wherever he was that he was loyal to me and he loved me,” she said.

Even though the couple have had many sweet memories there have been some challenges with the biggest one being the passing of their second child who was on 15 months.

“That really hit us hard as it was just a few years after we tied the knot. I was still training and we were still trying to build and get used to our life as a married couple.”

Now that the couple has retired, they spend their time listening to music or attending concerts as they love the classic, jazz and gospel genres.”We spend a lot of time reading and even had a small library in the house with various book collections. We also attend events together or go out to restaurants,” said Richard.

The couple has four children and five grandchildren.

Richard and Nontando share their love journey with the Highway Mail

50 years is a long time, what keeps your love going strong?

Richard: She is very helpful and tolerates me. Sometimes I’m moody and she does not hold grudges.

Nontando: We are friends more than anything else. Although he irritates me sometimes, I won’t choose anybody else. He is the light my life. He is my confidant and I still love him after all these years.

What is your recipe for a lasting marriage?

Richard: It is important to make compromises in a marriage as you are different people and would not like the same things. You have to trust each other and always look on the positive side. Another important thing in a marriage is to always renew your love with actions, your love won’t mature if you just sit back and not do nice and new things for your partner. Also couples need to help each other when facing a difficult situation.

Nontando: Do not take your partner for granted, because the love will fade away. Love is sensitive and being selfish kills it. Couples should share. Most importantly, lovers should not let people come between them. You should also take good care and love yourself, do not sit back comfortably and not take good care of your appearance because you are now married, people should age gracefully.

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