‘The crying needs to end’

“I don’t want to cry anymore.”

These are the words of Mama* when she talks about her children.

The Tedstoneville resident told the GCN that she was blessed with four children, but now she no longer feels that it is such a blessing.

“My youngest son, who is 16 years old, is doing well. He is being sponsored by a family and attends a private school,” she said.

“My other three, however, are not doing well.

“My eldest son and my daughter don’t seem to care about themselves or about me and my second youngest son is in the grip of drugs.

“Being a mother to them, especially when they abuse drugs, is incredibly difficult.”

Mama contacted the GCN to discuss the trials a parent who has a child who is addicted to drugs goes through.

“It is time to come out into the light and discuss this issue,” she said.

“Too often parents are scared and embarrassed and don’t know what to say when they suffer abuse at the hands of their own children.

“My child who is addicted to drugs steals from me and abuses me.

“My concern is how to deal with this as it is hurtful when children are on drugs.”

Mama told the GCN she has got to the point where she has had to run away from her children.

“I fled from my house in Eden Park in Alberton and came to stay in Tedstoneville as I work in Germiston.

“I couldn’t stay there any longer as my son is violent and he steals everything I own,” she said.

“I am hurt by this violence and by his treatment of me.”

Mama said the sad thing is that even though he hurts her she still worries about him.

“I think as a parent you will always worry about and love your children,” she said.

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She said she has tried numerous times to get him into a rehabilitation centre, but every time he just leaves and goes back to his old ways.

She told the GCN that her husband used to abuse her and after his death in 2003 she thought things would improve, but now she has become a victim again.

Two weeks ago when she went to the clinic her son saw her at the taxi rank and attacked her as he wanted money.

She was aided by members of the community and has opened cases of assault and domestic violence against him.

She is hoping that when he goes through the court system he will be ordered into a rehabilitation centre.

“He even stole my burial society uniform and sold that,” she said.

“Who knows what my house looks like now and what is left after I fled.

“I am sick and tired of crying and I am saying no more.”

Mama said it is time parents, especially mothers, said no more and took a stand.

“As parents, we need to come together and shout. There must be no more hiding,” she said.

“Our children are killing us and before I get killed I want to do something to stop the abuse and to help the community.”

To this end, Mama wants to start a support group for parents who are abused by their drug-addicted children, or those who just suffer abuse at the hands of their children.

“In my line of work, I aid the community, and the support group will go a long way to assist parents,” Mama said.

“The abuse is a terrible hurt on my heart and I think if we as parents come together we can find a solution.”

She added that parents must not hide anymore and should talk about the matter.

“If we can group together, maybe one day we can get the government to help us to get the children into rehab,” she said.

If you are going through a similar situation and would like to join Mama’s support group contact her on 083 598 2453.

*Not her real name.

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Contact the newsroom by emailing: Melissa Hart (Editor) germistoncitynews@caxton.co.za, Leigh Hodgson (News Editor) leighh@caxton.co.za or Busi Vilakazi (Journalist) busiv@caxton.co.za.

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