Corona Chronicles: One of Tracy Schloesser’s four-legged fur bundles is in disgrace

– Opinion –

It’s Day 7 of lockdown – the first week nearly ‘in sy moer’ – and one of the four-legged fur bundles is in disgrace. It was bound to happen, and no prizes for guessing which one!

The Chocolate Logs are well: Labradors – all they want is food, hugs and head scratches 500 times a day, and they stay permanently ‘waggy-tail happy’. (In their case, the tail definitely wags the dog and not the other way around.)

But Her Royal Highness, Liquorice Veronica Schloesser, defied all lockdown rules last night by heading out to the greenbelt and ended up disgracing herself in the very, very wee hours of this morning. The scratching noises under the bed signified that she had arrived with a gift for me (which normally has a tail) and sure enough, when I switched on the light, there was a seventy ‘eleventy’ centimetre rat! The only bonus was that it was no longer breathing which meant we did not need to proceed to Rat vs Mom races around the room!

So I woke up HP (Husband Person) to help dispatch of said rat and he responded by sending me to the kitchen for brooms and dustpans while he tried to ‘focus’. He then proceeded to use afore said broom to push the rat my way and I then had to scoop up the deceased little blessing and remove it for burial in the outside dustbin. HP was so supportive he was already back in bed and asleep by the time I returned. Bless him!