Entertainment

Six decades, two families, one story: The unmissable tale of ‘Don’t be Late for My Funeral’

Few directors, producers, or cast members become emotional during an interview—and not in any sense other than infectious passion.

Producer, director, and cast member of Don’t Be Late For My Funeral, Diana Keame, has put six decades and three familial generations of her own life into the documentary.  

It’s a film unlike any other South Africans will see. Keame’s production is a deeply personal exploration of love, sacrifice, and the shared histories of two families – one Black, one White – set against the backdrop of apartheid South Africa. It’s not woke, and it’s not trying to make a political statement. Instead, Keame has created a masterpiece of storytelling. It’s not just solid filmmaking; Don’t be Late for My Funeral resonates to the bone. 

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Film resonates to the bone

Central to the story is Margaret Bogopa Matlala, a domestic worker who became a part of the Keame family, raising three generations. Her life, said Keame, was defined by resilience, love, and quiet strength. The documentary shows the reverberation that Margaret’s impact on the Keane family has had, not as employers but as a much more intimate role player.

“Margaret wasn’t just a nanny,” Keame said. “She was family. She carried us—both literally and emotionally, throughout our lives. This even though her own family needed her just as much.” She added that it was this irrefutable kindness that never saw a division in race, especially when it came to children. “I don’t think any children are bad, Margaret used to say,” said Keame.  “She said that they’re all sweet. Black or white.”

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As a youngster, Margaret herded cattle with little more than sporadic schooling. Eventually, she moved to Johannesburg in search of work. “At the time,” Kean said, “her choice was to either become a nurse or a domestic worker. She chose the latter.” Margaret became a second mother to Keame and her siblings. But it came at a cost. As she cared diligently for the Keame children, her offspring were left to fend for themselves. It is this reality that Keame has struggled to reconcile with, and the documentary does not shy away from the uncomfortable truths of privilege. “The benefits we received came at a deep personal cost to her family.” 

Rushes of emotion

This dissonance is a central theme of the film, the unseen sacrifices that sustained so many white South African families during apartheid, she said. Keame was moved deeply by her experiences and remains visibly touched by the puzzle pieces that comprise her life. Margaret was a huge part of it, and in conversation about the film and its subject, rushes of emotion often punctuated Keame’s sentences.

Keame said that it took several years to source funding for the film and in the end, much of it was bankrolled from her own pocket. After spending much of her career in the film industry as an assistant director, fulfilling major roles in making the documentary – on screen to behind the scenes – was an exhausting task, but rewarding.

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Margaret may have passed in 2021, but she remains throughout the film just as she is indelible in Keame’s heart. This is a documentary not simply about the Keame family’s relationship with their domestic worker, put bluntly, but also the broader story of South Africa’s history. Women like Margaret were the backbone of many households. The film also honours Margaret’s own family. Her grandchildren, who have careers in the film industry and as models, stand as a testament to the opportunities Margaret never had. “Her grandchildren are thriving,” Keame reflected. “It’s a reminder of how far we’ve come since apartheid, but also a reflection of how much still needs to change”​

We’ve come far since apartheid

Keame said that while Margaret’s family welcomed the production, she received a measure of resistance from her own family because of the old wounds it might expose, including the suicide of her sister. 

Keame said that when audiences take in her work, she would like them to feel love, but also to feel moved. “Whatever your issue is, somehow the film hooks into that. I’ll give you an example. A young man who watched the film said to me his sister had tried to commit suicide and he liked watching the film.

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“And I said to him, “How did it help you to just see that I had a sister who committed suicide? He said it showed him that he was not alone. So, and that was huge for me because there’s something in the film that helps people to face their grief or to realise that they’re not alone or to just look at each other differently.”

This realisation could become the basis for a change in approach to relationships. Adding meaning. The title of Keame’s intimate dissection of relationships comes from a moment between her and Margaret at the funeral of Keame’s mother. “Margaret turned to me and said, ‘Don’t be late for my funeral.”

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By Hein Kaiser