Cancer (21 June – 22 July)
Sometimes Cancer, you seem to make a habit of pushing doors marked “PULL”. Apply the bit of brain you’ve got to come up with something amazing (Cancer? Amazing?) to make that extra money that is vital to your plan of being King/Queen of the world. There are people who are only too willing to help you, but you need to make the first move. And not sideways either – move ON!
Leo (23 July – 22 August)
Looks like right now you have both oars in the water, but on the SAME SIDE OF THE BOAT! You’re jogging along thinking that everything is wonderful and you don’t actually have to make choices right now. Wrong! You could end up with more than one job offer, so best you apply yourself at a speed and decide, before you lose all of them. Or both of them, or whatever. STEER!
Virgo (23 August – 22 September)
Right now you’re acting like a flower without an arrangement… Wake up Virgo, you know that you are greatly loved (WHYYY?) and that the people you have been a friend to will never forget your kindness. However, these same People also need to see you from time to time, for some reason or other, so best you put on your new shoes and do some visiting. Could make you prettier …
Libra (23 September – 22 October)
Libra, may your TV only get the Weather Channel! How about you take some notice of your partner? Pay attention to what he/she tells you about his/her feelings – it might give you some bright ideas on CHERISHING, SOMETHING HE/SHE SORELY NEEDS RIGHT NOW. Money matters can be discussed at a later stage, so can Taking Over The World.
Scorpio (23 October – 21 November)
When you’ve got around to screwing your head back on after believing that the world was coming to an end (you’re not so lucky), perhaps you can think about a new living arrangement. You need to look at all options, and don’t decide too soon. Listen to your partner’s preferences (Scorp? Listen? What am I saying?) but in the end it will be worth it. Don’t be a Namby-Pamby-Party-Pooper.
Sagittarius (22 November – 21 December)
“Can’t talk to you now, my cousin really needs my kidney!” Nice try Sag, but no banana! You and your partner really DO need to talk as soon as possible. That cloud that has been hanging over you needs to be lifted at a speed if you want to KEEP talking to each other. Stop playing stupid! (Then again, who says you’re playing?) Discuss that horrible issue and get it over with. No stalling.
Capricorn (22 December – 19 January)
Nothing like True Lurve to make a Cap even nutser than they usually are. On the highway of life, you closely resemble a stalled vehicle. WHAT, may I ask, is stopping you from taking what you want? This concerns a Person of Note, someone who will change your life forever. You know you want him/her, what’s the problemo? Aren’t you getting tired of the same old story??
Aquarius (20 January – 18 February)
There are bats in your belfry, termites in your ceiling and a leak in your think tank, Aqua! You know how much you want to be with that Special Person, but you are not making enough effort to get there. What is the MATTER with you? Are you vying for the position of Owner of the Heartbreak Hotel? Your job could do with some attention right now as well. Turn on your brain (?).
Pisces (19 February – 20 March)
It’s time to get UP! (But I just got up yesterday…) Yeah well! This appears to be going nowhere right now. You’ve come to a dead stop with the ambitions you had for making a load of money and Taking Over The World! What stopped you? You are perfectly capable of anything you attempt, despite indications to the contrary… Rope in a hapless friend to help you.
Aries (21 March – 19 April)
Duck, everyone! Aries is about to give us a piece of his/her mind! Sure you can afford it, A? Doesn’t seem to be working so well right now. Look at the lovelife (so-called), it could do with a face-lift at a speed. Your ideas for making money are wonderful, but you’re going nowhere with them AS well. Arming yourself with various sharp instruments is also not going to do the trick.
Taurus (20 April – 20 May)
“I’m nobody’s fool.” Well, maybe someone will adopt you. Take stock, Taurus. You really need to concentrate on sorting out your priorities – which comes first? Job or lovelife? Both together? You don’t get it – you are fabulous when you choose to be and you are greatly admired, so get on with it. Right now you’re acting like you left your brain to science and they made an early withdrawal.
Gemini (21 May – 20 June)
Looks like these days you can’t count to twenty without taking your shoes off. You have to come to a decision sooner or later about your work situation. You don’t get it – you CAN’T do everything at the same time. Settle down at what you do best – selling ice to Eskimos and then, with the proceeds, do some travelling to cure those itchy feet. Don’t, however, come back too soon.
Contact Zema on 083 430 1456.
