Parenting today – How to create a safer environment

Henning Jacobs, the trauma support co-ordinator at ER24, said parents need to spend more time with their children.

“The number one problem these days is that many parents do not spend enough time with children. If children do not get the attention they need at home, they could make the wrong choices, become vulnerable and put themselves in dangerous situations for example,” he said.

Apart from spending more time with your children, creating an open relationship with them is vital. “With an open relationship children will feel comfortable talking to parents about their problems.

“It is important to know how your child is doing emotionally. The only way parents will know this is if they build a relationship of trust with their children. Trust between a child and parent is vital.”

“Children need to know parents trust them and that they care. If a parent knows their child well enough they will be able to pick up from their behaviour and talks that something is wrong.”

“Pay attention to changes in personality or attitude. These could be signs that something is wrong.”

“There is also usually a problem when there is a drop in school marks and when children act strangely,” said Jacobs.

Internet, cellphones

The internet, cellphones and social media have advantages but there are dangers as well.

“One of the most common dangers posed to children is sexual predators and people who abduct children. Pornography is also freely available,” said Jacobs.

“Children need to be taught the positive and negative aspects of social media, the internet and use of cellphones.”

“Children should be made aware of the danger signs. They need to be educated on how predators for example work and what the warning signs are so they can protect themselves,” said Jacobs.

“Parents should have a rule that children can have a cellphone and access to internet, provided they, parents, are allowed to check their phones and internet history at any time.”

“Children do not like boundaries but they have to have boundaries,” said Jacobs.

Sexual assault, abuse

Adults must make children aware of issues like abuse, violence and sexual assault.

“Educating children will help them identify a threat and react promptly to help them avoid the danger.”

“Parents should also not be negligent. They should try their best to ensure their children are safe with whom they were left in the care of,” said Jacobs.

Parents aware of sexual assault, abuse and violence against a child as well as other people aware of parents guilty of this should report it immediately to the police and contact a social worker for assistance.

Victims should immediately seek the help of someone they trust.

“If they cannot tell anyone in the family, they should tell their teacher at school or call Childline.  They can also go to a police station,” said Jacobs.

Remember that abuse of a child does not only refer to a child being beaten. There are many forms of abuse that parents should be aware of such as mental, emotional and verbal abuse. These forms of abuse cause just as much damage to a child.

“A child who goes through trauma such as abuse is changed forever. It impacts the rest of their lives,” said Jacobs.

Being a parent and even a child today is not easy. For advice or help, contact Childline on 08000 55 555 or the police on 10111.

ER24’s Emergency Contact Centre can be reached 24 hours a day on 084 124 for any medical emergency.