Hacks for building your teen’s self-esteem and confidence

As parents, we want our teens to be secure in who they are. We cross our fingers that the encouragement and support we’ve provided them thus far has been sufficient to foster a healthy sense of self-worth.

The truth is that the adolescent years are full of change. The “reorganisation” of a teen’s brain can leave parents and adolescents feeling overwhelmed, fatigued, and bewildered.

As teens strive for their place in the world, many encounter experiences that contradict long-held views about themselves.

Fortunately, this is not the end of your impact! Follow these practical and highly effective techniques to help your teen develop into a strong, self-confident adult with a healthy self-esteem.

Love without conditions

Assure your teen that your love does not depend on their grades, performance, friend group, college, or any other element, including their decisions and actions.

Turn failures into learning lessons

Errors and losses can wreak havoc on a teen’s fragile self-esteem and confidence. When you criticise, panic, or constantly rehash a failure, you highlight a fixed mindset, essentially communicating that this setback indicates there is no prospect for future growth.

Instead, inhale deeply and initiate a conversation with your teen. Ask them questions like:

• Where did everything go wrong?
• What factors affected this choice?
• What did you gain from this experience?
• How do you intend to progress in a favourable direction?

Let them grow and learn from their mistakes instead of being ostracised for them.

Encourage your teen and praise them for trying

It is tempting to go overboard while praising your teen’s honours, awards, and accomplishments. Unfortunately, these things can become intertwined with a person’s sense of self-worth, leading them to believe they are only valuable if they achieve. While praise can foster resiliency, self-assurance, and initiative, we should also emphasise the importance of effort and the act of trying instead of accomplishing a goal.

Create a safe home environment

Create a safe environment for your teen to work through challenging issues. Allow your teen to speak freely about obstacles, peer conflicts, and complaints about “unfair” teachers and excessive homework. Then, discuss methods in which they might navigate these situations with confidence, courteously addressing others while maintaining their self-worth.

Promote diverse interests and activities

Teens that participate in a variety of activities, sports teams, volunteer opportunities, and educational activities typically have a greater sense of self-worth. They are not crushed by a failure in one area since they derive self-worth from other sources. When your teen participates in activities that benefit others, they develop a sense of purpose.

Highlight how we all make mistakes

Parents encounter obstacles and failures daily. We can use these occasions to demonstrate to our adolescents that we, too, are human and require assistance. Be sure to communicate your difficulties with your children. This develops a relationship with your teen and demonstrates that you are not perfect and are also learning and growing.

Listen and keep communication channels open

Maintain a healthy relationship with your adolescent and boost their self-esteem by resisting the impulse to convert every interaction into a “teaching opportunity” or lengthy lecture. Focus instead on listening to what your teen has to say. Avoid making assumptions, snap judgments, and taking the offensive. Consider your child’s perspective by placing yourself in their shoes. By recognising that reacting with logic or reason may push them away, you relate to them on an emotional level.

You can be empathic without agreeing with your teen’s perspective. Rather than focusing on being “correct” or having the last word, work on developing your listening skills.