Women empowered to choose motherhood or not – Durban women share their experiences
Various local women share why they have chosen to embrace motherhood or a child-free life.
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AS we celebrate Women’s Month, we recognise the diverse choices and experiences of women in motherhood.
Motherhood is a personal journey, influenced by various factors, such as career goals, financial stability, relationships and individual aspirations. While some women embrace motherhood with joy, others may choose a different path, opting for a child-free life or delaying parenthood. The decision to become a mother is a deeply personal one, and women’s empowerment means having the ability to make informed choices about their own bodies, lives and futures.
Caxton Local Media spoke to various local women about their choices of whether to pursue motherhood, shedding light on the unique perspectives and experiences that shape their journeys.
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Zandile Ntetha
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I have always known that I wanted to have children from when I was a child. I have two sons, and I love being their mother – it is like having forever besties. I used to play with dolls as a little girl with hopes that I would become a mother. Now that I have my dolls in human form, I have discovered that motherhood is also my calling. I love raising them and imparting knowledge that will help them become better members of society.
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Nokwanda Mlondo Sibisi
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I have one daughter, and being a mother has been a part of my dreams; also by virtue of being a married woman, I could say that motherhood chose me, too. I love the relationship I have with my daughter; it is very special. I believe motherhood to be another way I get to serve GOD and a way I get to be represented in future generations. I love the idea of somebody depending on me to grow and become a fully developed individual – it is fulfilling.
I do not wish to have more children. Being a mom of one currently works very well for me as a career woman, an academic and as somebody who is constantly exploring her own potential. I believe in being a fully present mother in every way, and I am finding that being a mom of one is manageable for me at this stage and allows me to be as present as I wish to be.
Sinoxolo Duma
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I have decided to be child-free, and I am enjoying it. What I mostly enjoy about being childless is that I have the freedom to navigate my 20s and my finances without any responsibility outside of myself. I can purchase myself the little and sometimes big materialistic items I used to gawk at during my years as a penniless university student. I have time to fully immerse myself in my academic career endeavours and even leisure without any added responsibility. Most of all, I enjoy the comfort and the serenity it brings me. Not having a child brings me a sense of contentment with my life because I do not feel pressured to acquire some level of success that is big enough to accommodate another human being. Because life has a tendency to just happen, I have not set it in stone that I will never be a mother.
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Anonymous
I am at the point in my life where I am weighing my options when it comes to motherhood. I am currently without a child after a termination a few years ago. At that time, I was not ready to carry a pregnancy or become a mother. I am still learning more about myself, and I would like to take on motherhood as an aware and mindful person – I believe children deserve such parents. I believe in taking my time in knowing myself and being fully immersed in adulthood before bringing someone [into the world] who is going to fully depend on me – and termination gave me the chance to do that. Whether I end up being a mom or not, I want a fulfilling life.
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