MUTUAL respect, support of each other and always presenting a united front to their children has been Des and Monique James’ secret to a happy, long marriage. The couple will celebrate their 60th anniversary on Thursday, 24 May.
Des and Monique met when they were teenagers. “My brother had a jazz band and he used to practice at our flat in Johannesburg on the weekends. I used to make tea and bake for them all. One day, Des came to one of the jazz sessions and I saw him. He didn’t stand a hope in hell after that!” said Monique. She was 14 at the time and met Des a month before his 18th birthday. The couple dated for three years before they got married.
“After we got married we had plans to go overseas when Des finished his apprenticeship, but I got pregnant and that put an end to that! I had our daughter, Debbie when I was 18, our son Barry when I was 19 and our son Russel two days before my 22nd birthday,” she said.
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Des was an apprentice when they got married and following that he worked on the mines, achieved his engineering certificate and was later a contract draftsman. Monique worked as a shorthand typist. The couple lived in Namibia for four years in the early 70s then moved back to Johannesburg.
“We then did a crazy thing! We were sitting in my brother-in-law’s pub and he was saying how sick and tired he was of the rat race in Johannesburg. They came up with a mad idea to buy a partnership and run a residential hotel in Durban,” said Monique.
The families moved to Durban in 1979 and lived on a property in Windmill Road. They bought a 47 roomed residential hotel opposite Durban High School called Lansdowne which Monique and her sister-in-law ran for four years.
“Those were fun times! The children were teens and they loved it! We stayed on in Windmill Road and they took over the hotel, which was eventually sold to SANCA and is now Lulama. In 1997 we started the B&B in Windmill Road called Windmill Ridge which we ran for 18 years, so we have been on the same property for 39 years,” she said.
The couple has seven grandchildren, ranging from 10 years to 35 years and five great-grandchildren ranging from three to eight years old.
Des is a keen gardener and is also busy writing a book while Monique pours her energy into making knitted toys as a hobby.
“I got three prizes at the Royal Show last year and have entered again this year. They are so much fun to make!” she said. She is also writing a book about their lives so their grandchildren and great-grandchildren will know all about them. “I have written over 390 pages now. It’s so important for the family to know where they have come from,” said Monique. She also writes poems and keeps fit with Pilates which she has done for many years.
The couple also love walking on the beach together every weekend and enjoy getting together with family and friends. They are also both avid readers.
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They will be moving to the South Coast next June. “We will so enjoy going down the coast as we have family there, it’s something to look forward to,” they said.
Des said Monique has been a wonderful life partner. “It’s been good! We never fight and we have a tranquil relaxed relationship,” he said.
“Des has always been supportive and has always encouraged me, be it with wood carving, beauty therapy or tapestry. He is the one who encouraged me to enter my toys,” she said.
The couple will celebrate their diamond anniversary with a breakfast with their daughter on Thursday. On Sunday they will celebrate with a picnic get-together with friends.
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