High SchoolKids

How to support your teenager through adolescence

Despite your teenager’s ups and downs, it is imperative that you - as the parent - remain their consistent base.

Raising a toddler is challenging but raising a teen can be even harder! One of the most important things that parents can give their teens is consistent support and care, even when your child says they don’t want you around!

It is often difficult for parents to provide their teenagers with consistent support due to the very inconsistent nature of adolescence. However, just as understanding your teen’s need for independence and developing their own identity is important, so is being there for your teen every step of the way. Here are a few expert tips for supporting your teenager through adolescence:

Be a shoulder to lean on

It is important for your teenager to know and believe that you are always there for them and that they can always approach you for support and assistance.  This involves trusting that your teenager will come to you when they need you.

Keep communication open

It’s important for parents to build a relationship in which your teenager knows they can open up to you.  This can be developed by them knowing that you will always be accepting of them no matter what they bring to you. This does not mean that you will always be accepting of their behaviour but rather them as a person who is human and allowed to make mistakes.

Give your child space to develop their independence

It is important for teenagers to make mistakes.  Often the best lessons learnt are the ones we experience ourselves.

When teenagers make mistakes they learn about consequences and knowing about consequences is vital for adulthood. It is important that you allow your teenager the independence (within reasonable limits) to be able to make their own decisions.  Your teenager will appreciate you allowing them this independence and this is likely to strengthen your relationship.

Trust your teen, but don’t ignore bad behaviour

Trusting in your teen is a difficult and an ongoing process. To cultivate a trusting bond with your teen, you’ll need to strike a balance between your rules and their independence. Respect their privacy, establish clear rules, and include them in the decision-making process.

If your teen disobeys or breaches their promise, don’t take it personally. However, do ensure your child understands there are consequences for misusing your trust and respond to the seriousness of that action.   Effective ways to “ground” your teen may be to assign extra chores or restrict privileges.    

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