Signs of a suicidal teen

It is reported that almost one in 10 teen deaths in South Africa is due to suicide and 75 per cent of people who commit suicide give some warning signs of their intentions.

Why do teens commit suicide?

•  People who are thinking about suicide feel alone and isolated and often feel like no one understands how they feel.
•  Changes in life may be upsetting and they may want to escape a difficult problem or situation, or find relief from terrible stress.
•  Many teens who are suicidal feel out of control and see suicide as a way to get back a sense of control in their lives.
•  Many teens feel that they are a burden on their family, and suicide is seen as a way to relieve that burden and punish themselves for something they think they have done wrong.
•  Teens may feel depressed after the death of a loved one, a friend, even a pet. Suicide may be their way to reunite with dead loved ones.

Signs to look out for:

•  Talking or joking about suicide. Your loved one might be talking about dying, threaten to kill him or herself, or say things like “nothing matters”, “I wish I was dead” or “I wont be around much longer”.
•  Depression: teens may feel hopeless, lose interest in doing anything, and withdraw from friends and family.
•  Preparing for death: many teens that are planning suicide will give favourite possessions away, or even say goodbye.
•  Self-criticism: listen to things teens say things like “I can’t do anything right”, “I’m hideous and pathetic”.
•  Changes in personality: someone who is usually sociable, may not want to go out, may become negative, aggressive, irritable and lose their friendships.
•  Loss of interest in appearance: drop in hygiene, if a teen stops caring about what they look like, getting dressed or even bathing or washing.

Risk-taking behaviour: often people who are feeling suicidal do risky, dangerous things like drink and drive, have unprotected sex, or take drugs.

•  Excessive feelings of guilt, self-blame, failure: if someone is depressed, they often feel guilty and blame themselves, and it can be very difficult to talk to them, be as patient as you can.
•  Suddenly feel better: If someone that has been very depressed, hasn’t been for treatment, is suddenly “back to normal”, may mean they have set a date for their suicide and know the pain will soon end.
•  Writing poems, essays about death, SMS’s or painting images of death could be a cry for help. Listen to it and get help.
•  Ask: If you have a friend who is talking about suicide or showing other warning signs, don’t wait to see if he or she starts to feel better, talk about it.

Talking helps in many ways it allows you to get help for the person; and just talking about it may help the person to feel less alone, less isolated, more cared about and understood.

Talking may also help them see another solution, asking someone if he or she is having thoughts about suicide can be difficult.

•  Try: “I’ve noticed that you’ve been talking a lot about wanting to be dead, have you been having thoughts about hurting or killing yourself?”
•  Listen: Listen to your friend without judging and offer reassurance that you’re there and you care. Stay close and don’t leave them alone.
•  Tell: Even if you’re sworn to secrecy and you feel like you’ll be betraying your friend if you tell, you should still seek help as soon as possible.

To help a friend you can call Sadag on 0800 21 22 23 or 0800 12 13 14 or SMS 31393 between 8am to 8pm.