Fifty years of pure harmony
Set against the backdrop of St Andrew's Methodist Church, in Yorkshire, England, a budding romance between Roger Gilder and Gwenda Parker began.
At that time Roger (25) and Gwenda (21) were involved in the Scout and Guide movements, the Sunday School and the church choir, which would become the basis of their relationship, due to their deep love of serving the community.
After four years of courting they married on June 26, 1965, and started the next chapter in their lives.
In 1969 the couple immigrated to South Africa with their children, Stephen and Helen, and settled in Selcourt, in Springs.
Involving themselves in the community helped them to make friends and to adjust to a new country and a new environment.
Roger’s efforts were soon acknowledged and he received an invitation to become a Rotarian.
It was then that he started his 37-year Rotary career in “Service above self”.
Not moving away from their common love for their community, the couple became involved in club projects, to alleviate the plight of the needy.
The Gilders moved to Benoni and settled in Farrarmere in 1991, and participated in community projects as they had done before.
Relationships can be challenging and the couple have a winning formula that has worked for them.
When they were asked how they managed to stay together for five decades, Roger said he believes the secret is ”moderation in all things except those things you like doing best”.
Communication, trust, love and respect are all aspects that should form the foundation of your relationship.
Gwenda said: ”When you love someone and they break the trust that you have in them, you can’t respect them, but we always trusted and respected each other.”
Gwenda described her husband as a wonderful man who has all these qualities.
On their recent trip to England there were celebrations that were held in honour of their 50 golden years of marriage.
The description that Roger gave to best describe his wife and his marriage was that marriage is about commitment and Gwenda fulfilled his expectations in their marriage.
The couple who still love each other very much have now settled in the Alan Woodrow Park Three Retirement Village in Dalpark.
