Believing in yourself is your full time job. People who believe in themselves do things that losers would never do, like starting at the bottom of a company: sweeping, making tea or doing the garden.
Start somewhere in proving to a boss that you are capable of small things and soon he will trust you with bigger responsibilities.
Don’t ever refuse to earn a small amount of money, as that very money will allow you to buy yourself soap and toothpaste; which is the first step in independence, the feeling that you, through God’s grace, are capable of looking after yourself.
The level of success you will reach as an adult starts in this moment. I am so proud to say that on the Youth Skills programme no girl has been dismissed for being pregnant — we will be five years old this December and I am so proud of every girl: Vongai Moyo, Tendai Moyo, and Maggy Sereku, who chose to become a mum when she started working and is now fully responsible for her daughter — well done; Thelma Mzadzi, Gratitude Mabena, Nelisiwe Xaba, Mami Mowedi, Matokoloho Williams, Susan Rapetsoa, Winnie Dumezweni, Jeanette Smith, Lerato Modibedi, Bulelwa Nzimande and Cindy Khonza (who left Kids Haven and now has a baby).
The choice to abstain from sex is the smartest choice any young person will make, as it guarantees you a life of certainty — you will be able to live life on your terms, you will be able to date a partner who also has self-control and, most importantly, you will avoid a lot of illness and heartache.
If you choose to become sexually active and you fall pregnant, as a girl you will have to make the heavy decision of what to do with the baby knowing that, if you plan to abort, that choice could haunt you for the rest of your life.
As a young man you will be burdened with the responsibility of fatherhood and being taken to court for not maintaining your child – there goes tertiary education, there goes peace of mind, there goes being young and carefree and partying all night.
You are living in the greatest stage of your life — treasure this time – read, be political, take an interest in all kinds of music so that you are informed of people’s pain and their genius – support a cause, make a difference. Put your fingerprint on the globe.
The best feeling in the world is standing back and saying to yourself — I DID THAT!
If you miss your gran, who passed away, volunteer at an old age home; if your mum loved cooking and you cannot be with her, assist in the kitchen; make your life fun, exciting and purposeful through being sober and playful.
Be the solution in your own life — don’t look to anyone else to do or solve things for you … you do it.
And, for every time you do that your life will blossom like a beautiful flower and your name and deeds will be remembered with sweetness.
Your music makes sex and revealing your body so cool. Is it OK for women to dress like that in a music video where we are being called “B and W”, and then ask yourself if you would be offended when someone does call you that?
If you are happy being called the “b” word and your boyfriend calls you that in anger — is it abuse? I hope that you have high standards for yourself, that you will aspire to be more than you were born into, that you will never have certain experiences – and that is dependent on how you treat yourself. Nobody can do to you what you haven’t done to yourself first.
Your success is about how comfortable you are in your skin and expressing your dreams daily. As children we have an inborn belief that we are here to change the world — we are. Every one of us is here to change the world. Sometimes we get in our own way — we begin patterns of behaviour of drinking and partying at weekends, buying clothing we can’t afford, and soon the little money that we are earning to change our lives and to be used for educating us becomes a curse and we start hating our job, blaming the government for being “useless” because we have not used the resources God gave us, for good.
Life is a magical process of learning and teaching and growing daily, so that at the end of it all you can say — I Did It! I am so much further from where I started.
I wish you God’s favour and eternal blessings. Thank you. All my Love — Adele Pillay, June 1, 3.06pm.
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