“I’m dead. I am in the devil’s playground. Drugs have led me nowhere. The only thing you will find in this dark valley are the skeletons of those who came before you. It is dark.”
These are the words of drug addict, *Sarah Reign.
Sarah, who grew up in Boksburg, approached the NEWS to share her story and encourage families not to support their loved ones battling addiction.
She stays in Edenvale and hopes to create awareness about the support needed for drug addicts from their families and society. This is her 14th year of drug addiction.
The 14 years of drug use have taken its toll on Sarah.
“I am emotionally unstable, my ethics and morals don’t exist anymore. I come from a big family but no one wants to speak to me now,” she told the NEWS.
“On one occasion my body couldn’t cope. At that time I was taking a mixture of heroin and crystal meth. For two weeks I experienced severe pains. I went to a doctor and was told that my liver and kidneys were failing and that my internal organs were deteriorating,” said Sarah.
She spent some time in the Edenvale Hospital in order to recover.
“Drug addicts are not all bad people.”
According to Sarah, things might be better for dug addicts if there was more support from families.
“It is a feeling and belief that I really, really want to get out, but I don’t know how.”
Sarah said that more awareness needs to be raised in order to know how to treat addicts.
“In a group of drug addicts, there are no friends. People steal from each other, they will turn on you, try and kill you – there is no loyalty among addicts.”
Sarah started using drugs in high school. She started smoking weed, a gateway drug as she describes it, as well as alcohol.
“I was hanging out with the wrong kind of friends, trying to explore and rebelling against my parents. My parents had warned me about it all. Friends are very important and youngsters need to watch out who they hang out with,” said Sarah.
“Growing up, a lot of drug addicts feel like outsiders or weird. I was one of those people. Drugs made me feel better and more confident.”
“The first 10 years were glamorous as no one knew I was taking drugs. There was still money and I was living a nice life,” said Sarah, who was a beauty therapist.
“I’m not proud of what I have done, but I am not ashamed for people to know either.”
Sarah said that she had tried a variety of drugs as a drug addict and these included weed, ecstasy, acid, CAT, cocaine, liquid, buttons, crystal meth and heroin, which she has been clean of since February.
“I’m so disconnected, people don’t know where to find me,” said Sarah.
“When you fall into the trap of drugs, you start losing people. All drug addicts have families, but no one has time for us – addiction should not be seen as a crime, it is a disease,” said Sarah.
“I came clean to my family after using heroin for seven months.”
She said her family had had their suspicions that she was using drugs but never knew it was heroin.
“As soon as I got to rehab I was judged by the drug I was using,” said Sarah.
Sarah was in rehab for 28 days and managed to stay clean for 60 days after going to rehab.
“While in rehab, my ex husband took my child. I never expected him to do it. He uprooted my child and moved him to a different school.”
Sarah added that rehabs don’t work if your are not there for a long time.
“You need a year at least in order to change the behaviour.”
“I take drugs to hide away from my feelings and escape,” said Sarah.
In one day Sarah and her boyfriend take a variety of drugs so that they can get high for one day.
They take R450 worth of crystal meth, R100 worth of liquid G, R40 worth of weed and R150 worth of buttons.
“Drugs are expensive, some girls prostitute their bodies, it kills them, it is heartbreaking,” said Sarah.
“Some addicts steal, while others will sell anything they can no matter if they get less than what its worth.”
In order to sustain their addiction, Sarah’s boyfriend does odd jobs where he will get paid between R4 000 and R9 000.
“I have never sold my body. Drug addicts suffer from malnutrition, they don’t eat, as most of the money they have goes to drugs. They waste away not only from the lack of food but emotionally as well,” said Sarah.
She said that if a youngster were to come to her and ask her for drugs she would tell them, “Come with me, see the people I live with, see where I live. The typical conditions for a drug house is that it is cluttered and a mess. I am 31 years old and I have nothing. Do you want that 10 years from now? Children must say no to drugs, drugs cause destruction, you can’t build a life on drugs, you will be surrounded by broken people.”
“I don’t have a place to call home,” said Sarah.
Sarah said she has not seen her child for eight months.
“It is too hard for me to see my son. It made me realise the damage I have caused to the relationships that I had – just to get high.”
* Name changed to protect her, her family and child.
