Care centre hosts remembrance ceremonies
There is a general tendency to remain silent about the death of a resident, but inside, there is a feeling of grief that goes unexpressed because there is no outlet or opportunity to express it.
The Rand Aid Association’s Ron Smith Care Centre is in the process of initiating candle-lighting ceremonies to say farewell to residents who have died.
“There is a general tendency to remain silent about the death of a resident, but inside, there is a feeling of grief that goes unexpressed because there is no outlet or opportunity to express it. And yet the death of a resident is often a painful experience for caregivers, especially for those who had formed close bonds with the one who has died.
“There doesn’t seem to be any opportunity at work to acknowledge, grieve or process the death of someone you may have cared for and felt close to. Sometimes it seems as if death is just part of the job and we need to get on with the tasks of the day, without stopping to remember and honour the one who has died,” said Mr Rae Brown, the chief executive officer of the Rand Aid Association.
“As human beings who feel the pain of death, it is good to take a moment in the day where we stop what we are doing and acknowledge, honour, remember and celebrate the life of the one that we cared for. We need to acknowledge that this person’s life and death has meaning and we need to find closure over the fact that this person is no longer with us,” said Mr Brown.
Ms Zabeth Zühlsdorff, of Rand Aid GM Services and Advance Division, said the candle-lighting ceremony to honour and remember the person who has died recognises and gives the opportunity to express feelings.
Ms Debbie Christen, the manager of recreational programmes said, “The first ceremony was held for the Lakeside wing on June 25. It was a beautiful gathering of staff and residents who came together to honour and remember resident Ms Marie Kruis. Sister Tando Ncube lit the candle of remembrance and gave us a little background story about Ms Kruis. Caregivers Ms Mmathapelo Ratlhagana and Ms Ellen Ntombela spoke about Ms Kruis and gave us spiritual readings and prayers of comfort and hope. Other residents and staff also shared their thoughts, feelings and memories about Ms Kruis.”
Sister Ncube said, “The fact that we had our candle-lighting ceremony at Lakeside on the same day as Marie’s memorial service was right and fitting. It was wonderful for the staff and I to be able to gather together and say good-bye to Marie in this way. To be allowed to celebrate Marie’s life and express our sorrow about her death was meaningful to us. We didn’t feel as if we had to hide our tears and we felt free to express ourselves. We left the ceremony feeling at peace.”
