ALBERTON – Many people find the ideas of rape or molestation outside the realm of their reality. Adults who find that this has happened in their own home or were committed by those they trust may not know how to deal with the situation. Victims are sometimes not believed because the offender is someone known to them.
Henning Jacobs, trauma support coordinator at ER24, said victims who chose to keep quiet or who were never taken seriously while they were young must seek justice by reporting the perpetrator even today.
“Some victims keep quiet for many years and live with the pain and trauma. Perpetrators must be brought to book. Finding justice will help victims work through their emotional problems. The first step is to report the incident/s to the police and to open a case. Victims should seek legal advice on the steps they should take and seek counselling,” Jacobs explained.
Jacobs indicated that children should be taught as early as possible that no one is allowed to touch them inappropriately.
“Crimes such as rape or molestation committed by a father, uncle or someone else like a brother or family friend, is shockingly common. Girls and boys should be informed from the age of three what behaviour is ok and what is not. They should be taught that they do not have to do anything they do not want to do when it comes to physical touch. Make them aware of their bodies. Parents should ensure they have a great relationship with their children so that their children are comfortable telling them anything,” he said.
Jacobs said perpetrators misuse the term love to fool children. “Children are blackmailed and often keep quiet out of fear.”
Adults who keep quiet to protect an abuser are breaking the law. Jacobs said that children should speak to another trusted adult if they encounter problems with the initial person they confided in.
A case should be opened and charges should be laid against the perpetrator. The police can help victims by finding a social worker to assist them. An educational psychologist also needs to be involved so that the child can receive professional help.
“Extensive counselling is needed to help ensure that the child works through the emotional and physical trauma they have experienced,” Jacobs said.
Signs that parents can look out for in children who have been sexually assaulted include personality changes. If a child is generally talkative and all of a sudden is withdrawn, this could be a sign. A child may withdraw from the person who harmed them.
ER24’s Emergency Contact Centre can be reached 24 hours a day on 084 124 for any medical emergency.