How often do we talk ourselves out of speaking the whole truth, in our efforts to dodge a bullet? Does that bullet not end up finding us anyway?
We have all heard stories about people who build lives, careers and relationships on serious lies. No, I will not make an example of Dr Pallo Jordan, or rather just Mr Jordan?
Lying is acceptable. Especially to protect yourself, or the ones you love, right?
We have also just mastered the art of withholding information. We comfortably leave out the details of the story that will land us in trouble.
For me, the hard part of being dishonest is remembering the extent. What great trouble it is to remember exactly how much of the story you “spiced” up or twisted. I talk too much and my mouth is usually far ahead of my brain. So I don’t do well at covering up stories.
But here is the weirdest thing I have discovered since I decided to just be honest – people appreciate honesty. It’s not money, but it’s scarce. People almost always expect us to be dishonest, in our favour. So when you speak the truth, they are disarmed.
And honesty is liberating. It gives you the chance to live and be who you are, without fear of being caught. You don’t have to wonder if the next thing you do will contradict the lie or help solidify it.
Secrets, on the other hand, grow faster than mushrooms. The more you add to the lie, the more space the secret takes in your lungs. It restricts your ability to move and breathe freely. Soon you cannot move a centimetre without fearing that the truth will come out and kill you.
The thing about the truth is that it is self-sustaining. No matter how much we deny it, it has the confidence to stand without dropping its head. It does not get tired of following us everywhere we go. And it is definitely not intimidated by dishonesty.
Honesty is still the best policy, implement it.
