Men have rights too
“Men are also victims of abuse, they are mostly abused emotionally than physically thus their wounds are not evident."
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Kwatsaduza – “Men want to be heard, their voices are suppressed, and have been stripped of their rights to lead the households since the dawn of democracy.
“Society has shifted all its attention to empower a girl child, leaving a boy child behind.
“We need to ask ourselves if we are busy empowering a girl child what is happening to the boy who is labelled as trash by society?”
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These were the words of Bongani Ngomane from the Social Development Men’s Forum who was speaking with the African Reporter for its feature on 16 Days of Activism for No Violence against Women and Children Campaign which takes place annually from November 25 (International Day of No Violence against Women) to December 10 (International Human Rights Day).
“As a society, we need to understand that the ‘gender’ in gender-based violence doesn’t only stand for women, but all genders.
“Men are also victims of abuse, they are mostly abused emotionally than physically thus their wounds are not evident.
“The only difference is that they often don’t speak out, or report their cases to the police because of fear of secondary victimisation.
“They are taught from a young age to be strong and not show any signs of weakness.
“They are told they have to go to initiation schools to prove their manhood even though many die while chasing the crown.
“Their value in the household is measured when they are providers but the minute they lose their source of income they are deemed useless and get stripped of the position of a leader.
“We have very few organisations advocating for the rights of men compared to those of women. This should tell you men don’t have anywhere to run to deal with their pain,” he explained.
Ngomane added that as society we need to understand that a normal human being will not derive joy from exerting pain on another.
Also read: Uniting communities against GBV through sport
“This should tell us that our men are damaged because hurt people hurt others.
“The problem is our system now views all men as perpetrators where else they should be working with men to identify the root causes,” he said.
Ngomane emphasised that as an organisation, they are not advocating for the rights of perpetrators and abusers but for those of men.
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