![](https://images.caxton.co.za/wp-content/uploads/sites/32/2017/03/DOREEN-Custom.jpg)
While we were reminiscing about the good times we shared with our beloved late friend, one of the friends mentioned that they actually have their funeral planned to the last detail.
This came as a shock to me because of my fear of death – I don’t even want to think of the day I die, let alone plan for it.
For a minute, I thought to myself why would anyone want to plan their funeral?
I also asked myself whether we are so organised and such control freaks that we also want to plan our last day on earth.
I decided to listen to what he was sharing with an open mind without judging him to get to understand where he is coming from.
He explained to us that he would rather be cremated than buried and wants his ashes kept on the room divider.
This would make it easier for his family members to interact with him daily in the comfort of their own home, he said.
He has drafted a programme of speakers and pastors to facilitate the event because “he doesn’t want people who barely know him to share lies about the life he led”.
He also would rather have a small event where only close friends and family members would be allowed to attend and reminisce about the times they shared with him.
Another friend shared that this is actually a growing trend in the country and many people are now picking up their favourite casket and paying it off before they pass on.
They also choose the grave site where they want to be buried.
A week later, I am still puzzled about this and trying to understand this better.
My head is buzzing with questions and one of them is: Is this different from paying monthly funeral premiums and life cover?
Isn’t it the same thing though? We pay funeral and life cover because we don’t want our loved ones to be stressed about affording a dignified funeral during this stressful period.
With this growing trend, the deceased gets to plan their funeral in advance and the family will not be stressed during that time.
I am still scared of death and I doubt I would one day change my mind about planning my funeral.
That is a sad event which I don’t want to think about, not even in one of the hardest periods of my life.
I guess this really was an ‘each to their own’ moment for me.
I will pass on not having judged those who prefer to follow this trend and plan their own funeral.