Eish! 29.7.2016 08:32 am

Want a yellowbone baby? Buy this guy’s sperm

A picture that is doing the rounds on Facebook.

A picture that is doing the rounds on Facebook.

These tough economic times have given birth to the most unusual business ideas.

Finance Minister Pravin Gordhan on Wednesday said the South African economy would avoid a recession in 2016 but remain in a low-growth trap.

Speaking on the sidelines of the Nedgroup Investments Summit, he said National Treasury would revise its 0.9% growth forecast in time for the Medium Term Budget Policy Statement in October.

The SA Reserve Bank also does not expect the economy to grow in 2016, with governor Lesetja Kganyago saying the domestic economy is in a low-growth trap.

>>READ MORE: Gordhan confident SA will avoid recession

Though Gordhan’s statement can offer one a sigh of relief, it does not change the high unemployment rate that has left young people under pressure to survive in these tough economic times, globally.

While some are lucky to get decent jobs to support their family and lifestyle, some are left with no option but to start their own businesses, though some of those ideas may end up being a bit strange.

A good business idea is one that identifies the demand and target market, and one shouldn’t think of providing services that are either not needed or are already being offered.

Here are some of the strangest business ideas The Citizen has seen doing the rounds:

In a picture that has gone viral on Facebook, one light-skinned guy has taken it upon himself to fight unemployment by selling his sperm, and women who prefer to have light-skinned babies are his target market.

We’ve all seen how the “yellowbone craze” has taken over, with women bleaching their skin to “look more attractive”, regardless of the damage the chemicals might do to them.

“Guaranteed light-skinned kids with grey/green eyes,” the caption on the picture reads, with one small bag going for $50 and two for $80, encouraging the principle of buying in bulk to save money. What makes this guy’s idea “so good” is that he makes 100% profit and the manufacturing process costs him nothing but about 15 minutes of his time (we’re guessing). The guy is not from Mzansi, as you can see, and he is charging in dollars.

Bringing it closer to home, a word of advice that has been given to first-time Joburgers is that, when you walk in the streets, don’t show anyone you have no idea where you’re going.

However, if you fail to hide that fact, you will be greeted by young men who will offer to either direct you to your destination or take you there. Do not be deceived, they are not being nice, it is a business transaction. Directions will cost you R35, and we are not sure how much the walk to your destination will cost you.

Joburg is big and you’re likely to get lost the first time you give it a visit, so a few young men saw a business opportunity and decided to make the most of it.

Another business idea that has hit Mzansi is professional mourners – a funeral service offered by a company with the same name and providing the bereaved with an opportunity to hire mourners at the funeral of their loved one.

Professional Mourners CEO Dumisani “PineDeep” Ngobene spoke to Connect and explained how his business was simply an idea he had come up with on the spur of the moment, which surprisingly turned out well.

“I decided to think outside the box, plus there’s a funeral every week, so I thought, ‘why can’t I make money off this?’” said the CEO.

As bizarre as this may sound, Professional Mourners is a business taken very seriously, and it includes interviews/auditions and actors/actresses as part of its recruitment process . When asked what particular criteria Ngobene used in auditions, he explained that he mainly looked for someone who was excellent at expressing emotion.

>> READ MORE: Boost the funeral of a loved one with a professional mourner

The team he currently works with is, in fact, a group acting students currently finishing off their acting qualifications.

What is the most unusual business idea you’ve heard of?

Additional reporting by Moneyweb



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